CEO Wagoner Optimistic About Amazing Hybrid That Converts Rat Shit into Clean Burning Hydrogen Fuel
12-10-2008
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA - The future is here for automotive giant GM, and that future is in the form of the all-new 2009 Chevy Roadent. The Roadent is a sporty, highly sophisticated, Subcompact -All Terrain-Tractor Trailer-Pickup-RV-Hatchback-Chopper-SUV that GM just debuted at the 2008 Los Angeles Auto Show.
"The technologically advanced Roadent will be the savior of the American Auto Industry!" says GM CEO Rick Wagoner.
The Chevy Roadent, designed by a man named Jed… a poor mountaineer; barely kept his family fed… holds the key to GM's future.
A GM spokesman told us that Jed came up with the Roadent's advanced Hydrogen/Hamster design one day when he was "out shootin' at some food."
And up through the ground came a bubblin' crude
Oil that is, black gold, Texas tea
GM's mastermind Wagoner quickly bought out all of Jed's patents.
Well first thing ya know ol' Jed's a millionaire
Kinfolk said, "Jed move away from there"
Wagoner knew he had a good thing, "When I first met Jed Clampett I thought he was just another unrealistic eccentric inventor, but since getting to truly understand him and his assistant Jethro Bodine, I now realize they are two of the most outstanding minds in automotive engineering history.
Wagoner spoke to reporters from Car and Driver, Motor Trend, and Consumer Reports Magazines before personally putting the hydrogen/hamster-powered 'Roadent' through its paces around a nearby test track.
"The new Chevy Roadent will be the most environmentally friendly vehicle since our 4 mile per gallon Hummer," boasted Wagoner.
"Well now its time to say goodbye to Jed and all his kin
And they would like to thank you folks for kindly droppin' in
Y'all come back now, y'hear? And please remember… if you don't give our Chevy Roadent good reviews, we don't give a rat's ass!"
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